Although there are no guarantees, most couples in therapy do very well. They learn new ways to communicate with one another, understand how each partner plays a role in the cycle of their interactions and they work on establishing new behaviors together.
Occasionally one partner is not so sure couple therapy is for him or her. I suggest that both partners come in together for a consultation and explore their issues to decide if this is the right process for them.
Collaborative divorce is a team approach by which couples commit to work together in an open, honest environment to resolve their differences fairly and to avoid court to end their relationship. Each partner has an attorney as well as a coach and possibly a child specialist and financial professional to assist them in dealing with the difficult issues. The couple problem solve together with the help of the team to create the best possible outcome for all concerned.
Divorce coaching and therapy are very different. While a therapist is often very helpful , a coach has a different function. A coach guides the couple (if there is one coach) or the individual (if there are 2 coaches) through the process. Specifically, the coach helps the partners deal with their emotional issues surrounding the divorce and is often present during the sessions with the attorneys to monitor the emotional climate and deal with intense feelings. A coach creates a feeling of safety for the parties as they express their feelings and needs to one another.
A family specialist is an expert in dealing with children of divorce. She is schooled in child development and is knowledgable in developing parenting plans and visitation. These range from joint to sole custody with a multitude of visitation arrangements. She can give advice about dealing with transitions to help children adjust to their situations. A family specialist works as a neutral professional always maintaining the value of the best interests of the child.
Parent coaching helps parents deal more effectively with issues they have with children. Whether there are frustrations dealing with toddlers, setting limits for children about media use, or adolescent problems, Barbara helps parents with specific interventions and to get on the same page to work together. She helps couples who live together as well as those who are divorced and co-parent.
Elder Mediation is a process for intergenerational families in conflict, to deal with the complex issues that arise with an elderly parent who is in need of care. All family members can be involved and work together to resolve issues of health, living arrangements, finances, family communication etc. The goal is to reach decisions that work for everyone and help the family members reduce their stress and stay connected.